Showing vs Telling: Tense

A debate rages in academe and mass market publishing circles concerning the term Standard English. The 'right wing' contends that attempting to instill Standard (i.e. correct) English encourages class divisions and stereotypes. The 'left wing' debates that a Standard English Style is an effective tool to help students master the language and improves communication. Right or left, a person who cannot communicate effectively is condemned to a second-class life and limited opportunities for advancement, especially in the publishing world.

Birth of Showing vs. Telling

Mark Twain introduced showing, especially in his essay 'The Elephant Hunter.' Publishing houses have continued to distort the concept of a standard English type by focusing more on a sentence's ability to create a 'movie in the mind' of the reader, or elicit an emotional response from the reader. The conflicts and contrasts between The Chicago Style of Grammar, the mass market publisher's bible, and the Associate Press Style of Grammar, the journalist and academic favored style. Universities confuse the issue more by claiming that their English style is the right one, even if it is the New York, Bitish, or an independent grammar style. A quick study of all these styles reveals some startling contradictions and contrasts between what is right and what is wrong.

Whatever the status of the debate one thing is clea, despite the idealists, society judges people by their ability to speak and write. Poor grammar stereotype a person's background, their education, and their ability. In this way, many writers receive form rejection letters before their fiction story is read by an editor.

Common Mistakes

Wrong Form of Verb
Verb Tense Problems Simple Past vs. Perfect Past Tense This mistake red flags a writer's failure to master elementary school English, Verbs have different forms, or principal parts, depending on the time.

The dog set down.
The dog sat down.
The dog sit down.

He come home. He came home.

A cheap reference manual, or even a few printed pages at the side of a computer, will help a writer learn that a person can set something down, or they can sit in a chair, or, they might have sat down yesterday. He can come home now, but he came home in the past tense, and he will come home in the future.

This becomes more confusing with the following example. I see today. I saw yesterday. I can be seen tomorrow. He gives today. He gave yesterday. He will give tomorrow. He has given already. The Perfect Past Tense, which uses the To Be, and the Simple Past Tense which makes things sound like they are happening as the story is read, cause writers the biggest problems. Showing requires the use of simple past tense, but in many problems this is the wrong tense, perfect past tense should be used.

The police officer paced the room. Jim leaned back in the chair and held his breath while he waited. After a moment, it was obvious that the detective had to admit defeat. Jim couldn't have commit the crime. ___(choose right answer)_

a) He had had a broken arm.
b) He had a broken arm.
c) He broke his arm.
d) His arm was broken.

Depending on the tense, each of these sentences can be correct. However, the first version is Perfect Past Tense and frowned upon by some mass market publishing houses.

a) This sentence is grammatically correct, but it is perfect past tense. b) This is the right answer if the story is written for a mass market fiction publisher

Lie and Lay

I lie down.
I lay the book down.
I lie awake at night.
He lies awake every night.
I lie in the bed.

I lay in the bed yesterday.
Snow lay in a thick blanket.
I laid the book down.
"Lay that down."

I lied down. (wrong)
I lied about breaking the vase. (right)
I use to lie about my age.
She is lying.
We laid a new carpet in the hall.

Except for the ones marked, these are all right. The easiest way to learn what version to use, make a cheat sheet based on your genre's or publishers' grammar style.

Use the simple present forms when you mean action which happens consistently or action which is happening presently.

Jill always lays the telephone on the counter. (This action happens consistently.)

Charles lies in the middle of the boxing ring. (This action is happening presently.)

Use the simple past forms when you mean action completed in the past.

Rachel laid the proposal on Mr. MacDonald's mailbox. (Laid = simple past tense of lay, to put or to place something or someone down.)

Jill lay on the lounge. (Lay = simple past tense of lie, to rest or recline.)

When the time is not included, the simple past tense form can make the action sound like it is happening while the reader is reading the story.

Showing
Jill walked across the hall and laid the report on Mike's desk. She turned and froze. Mike lay on the floor, feet elevated, eyes fixed on the ceiling.

Examples:

Telling
Jill walked across the hall. She had laid the report on Mikes desk then turned around. She was frozen, stunned at the sight of Mike. He was laying on the floor with his feet elevated, eyes fixed on the ceiling.

This is the dilemma that meets most writers. It doesn't matter whether the grammar style is correct, Perfect Past Tense is telling about events that happened in the past.